I'm telling myself 2012 is going to be the year I get married. I actually wrote that down as a resolution. I'm sure I made God laugh when He saw it. One thing I have realized lately is that the more I know what it is I want in a man. I ask myself, do I have those very same qualities that I'm asking for. The man that I'm asking God for is exactly who God is. I want to fight for him, be the strength he needs when life knocks him around. But yet it's so easy to feel so insignificant. I find it so easy to think so less of myself than to see who Jesus sees me as, His.
He gave me a guardian heart for a reason but yet I hide the little girl inside me and keep her from the rest of the world. Why don't I want others to come close? If I won't even let Jesus come close, I know He's not going to send someone. Though I wish He would at times. I guess no one really can love me the way my Dad loves me. The kind of love I want in a guy is only the kind that Jesus knows how to provide.
I wish I knew how to accept love and guard it. I hate those moments when just the sight of couple gives you a sinking feeling in your gut. I cried the other day at just a sight like that. I wasn't expecting it to happen and it hurt. The most comforting thing in that moment was that I told God about it. I can't wait to be madly in love with the guy that will say Kay I am yours and I'm going to say that is so cool.
Showing posts with label bible. Show all posts
Showing posts with label bible. Show all posts
Tuesday, January 10, 2012
Clinging to the One Who Loves You The Most
Welcome to the new year, 2012. I have lived to enter double digits in the 2000s. That itself is a blessing. Many of you may have planned New Years, I did.I was surprised how long my list for this year was. It felt good to think of things that I would like to have done differently than I had last year. Recently the church I attended sent out a monthly newsletter. In it, the speaking pastor talked about pursuing righteousness. On my resolutions I wrote that I wanted to grow more in Christ but I never thought about pursuing it. For me, lately I've been afraid to pursue anything.
That includes pursuing Christ. For me being the one that always pursued the guys only to get hurt. That idea sends me running in the opposite direction. It scares me to pursue Christ wholeheartedly, I mean the most intimate details about me. To give him that level of control of my heart is a frightening thing. I woke up this morning to James 1:22-25:
That includes pursuing Christ. For me being the one that always pursued the guys only to get hurt. That idea sends me running in the opposite direction. It scares me to pursue Christ wholeheartedly, I mean the most intimate details about me. To give him that level of control of my heart is a frightening thing. I woke up this morning to James 1:22-25:
22 But be doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving yourselves. 23 For if anyone is a hearer of the word and not a doer, he is like a man who looks intently at his natural face in a mirror. 24 For he looks at himself and goes away and at once forgets what he was like. 25 But the one who looks into the perfect law, the law of liberty, and perseveres, being no hearer who forgets but a doer who acts, he will be blessed in his doing.
This has been a great struggle for me to do this because I have not allowed God to get close to my heart. It's foolish to even think this but yeah, I can't get myself to do this. It only leaves me frustrated and stuck in this rut that I really want to get out of. It's so surprising and weird at the same time to see what sin inside you looks like. It's like seeing The Spirit in you and seeing your flesh and I look away. I forgot to look at the Spirit in me who's working to show what I am in Christ. How beautiful that is to be known as His. It's going to take me some time to accept and believe this. It's not an easy thing when you feel like an orphan in this world. The unbelief that I am alone is truly a lie. I no longer want to be in the shadows of my fears. The greatest blessing I always must remember is that Christ died in my place. What it means to be a true Christian? it's bigger than anything I can wrap my mind around.
Sunday, November 21, 2010
Jealousy of Those in Relationships
Over the last few weeks a number of my Christian friends have either started new relationships, gotten engaged or have gotten married. I'm excited for all of this happening in the lives of my friends but I confess my sinful flesh has brought up twinges of jealousy. Especially if you're on the single end of the spectrum, thoughts like : "What about me? Don't I deserve happiness too?" Satan begins to feed lies of jealousy, apathy, pride, anything that he can use to get us to not trust in God.
When I feel my own heart starting to go astray, by the power of the Holy Spirit I am stopped dead in my tracks. Only by His will because my heart really wants to go astray. I'm reminded of Jeremiah 17:9NIV - the heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it? It is only then I realize that my heart is look not looking to please God. I have told Him in my heart that what He has ordained for me right now is not sufficient.
Realizing the error of my ways and the ultimate nature of sin is to lead me to death, the fear of the Lord leads me in the correct wisdom and I see in the midst of my sin that the Lord is always with me and catches me before I stumble. Verses in Scripture that encouraging for such a situation like this when Satan has cornered you is:
Proverbs 9:10
The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom,and the knowledge of the Holy One is insight.
2 Corinthians 12:9
But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me.
2 Peter 1:3
[ Make Your Calling and Election Sure ] His divine power has granted to us all things that pertain to lifegodliness, through the knowledge of him who called us to his own glory and excellence, and
When I think of all that Jesus has done for us, I have to submit to the will of God because again I understand that my desires wants to lead me to death but God's greater plan lead me to life and for all those who have been called by Him. How has Christ helped you in this situation? I sign off with this verse of encouragement:
When I feel my own heart starting to go astray, by the power of the Holy Spirit I am stopped dead in my tracks. Only by His will because my heart really wants to go astray. I'm reminded of Jeremiah 17:9NIV - the heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it? It is only then I realize that my heart is look not looking to please God. I have told Him in my heart that what He has ordained for me right now is not sufficient.
Realizing the error of my ways and the ultimate nature of sin is to lead me to death, the fear of the Lord leads me in the correct wisdom and I see in the midst of my sin that the Lord is always with me and catches me before I stumble. Verses in Scripture that encouraging for such a situation like this when Satan has cornered you is:
Proverbs 9:10
The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom,and the knowledge of the Holy One is insight.
2 Corinthians 12:9
But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me.
2 Peter 1:3
[ Make Your Calling and Election Sure ] His divine power has granted to us all things that pertain to lifegodliness, through the knowledge of him who called us to his own glory and excellence, and
When I think of all that Jesus has done for us, I have to submit to the will of God because again I understand that my desires wants to lead me to death but God's greater plan lead me to life and for all those who have been called by Him. How has Christ helped you in this situation? I sign off with this verse of encouragement:
1. I therefore, a prisoner for the Lord, urge you to walk in a manner worthy of the calling to which you have been called, 2.with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, 3. eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace. Ephesians 4: 1-3(ESV)
Sunday, October 31, 2010
In Response to: What The Bible Has To Say About Sex
Time Magazine recently published an article called What the Bible Has to Say About Sex. I couldn't even read the whole article I was so disgusted and upset with a righteous anger by the author Micheal Coogan. He has a book out called God and Sex: What The Bible Really Says.
I absolutely in no way recommend that you go out and buy this book. Don't you dare! This guy obviously is full of head knowledge but has no true foundation of a relationship with Christ. Nowhere in this article does this author profess anything about Christ. This guy is a false teacher in the worse kind because he's deceiving unbelievers, those who may not be strong in their faith and most likely deceiving himself. The most amazing thing about Scripture is that it is always proven true. God does not lie and everything in the Bible is consistent because every aspect of it points to Christ.
If you really want to understand what sex really means to God. The ironic thing about this article is that the author talks about the Book of Song of Solomon. Sex is a beautiful and amazing thing that God created in the context of marriage. If this author had been truly discerned by the Holy Spirit he would have realized that the church, the Bride of Christ is the one that is longing for His Return. He has promised that He is coming back to take us home with Him where we will be where we belong.
The true meaning of sex should serve to us as believers the longing and satisfaction that only can be found in Christ. He is the one that created marriage to show to us another aspect of who He is. Again going back to the intimacy and fellowship that He had with the Father before He came down to earth to die for all of mankind's sin. If he dug deeper and got rid of all the head knowledge and realized who He is in light of what Christ has done and who Jesus is, he would've been very careful to write that book.
I absolutely in no way recommend that you go out and buy this book. Don't you dare! This guy obviously is full of head knowledge but has no true foundation of a relationship with Christ. Nowhere in this article does this author profess anything about Christ. This guy is a false teacher in the worse kind because he's deceiving unbelievers, those who may not be strong in their faith and most likely deceiving himself. The most amazing thing about Scripture is that it is always proven true. God does not lie and everything in the Bible is consistent because every aspect of it points to Christ.
If you really want to understand what sex really means to God. The ironic thing about this article is that the author talks about the Book of Song of Solomon. Sex is a beautiful and amazing thing that God created in the context of marriage. If this author had been truly discerned by the Holy Spirit he would have realized that the church, the Bride of Christ is the one that is longing for His Return. He has promised that He is coming back to take us home with Him where we will be where we belong.
The true meaning of sex should serve to us as believers the longing and satisfaction that only can be found in Christ. He is the one that created marriage to show to us another aspect of who He is. Again going back to the intimacy and fellowship that He had with the Father before He came down to earth to die for all of mankind's sin. If he dug deeper and got rid of all the head knowledge and realized who He is in light of what Christ has done and who Jesus is, he would've been very careful to write that book.
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