I don't know how some people can wait it out so long to find their true love. Sitting here waiting feels like serving a prison sentence. Longing for that one that was designed to complete you. Everytime this feeling sets in and it always does when I break my Father's heart because of sins that I refuse to confess, I see how much I long for Jesus to come back.
I long for His return when things will be right again. When the God of all creation made me to glorify Him, that day is coming when I can love Him back as hinderances have been wiped away from His sight.
Hebrews 12:1-2 ESV
"Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God."
I wish he was here and oh all the hot guys who are so dead without Christ. Already God is challenging me to pray for these lost sheep. He doesnt always give you what you want. I know I could easily be ripped apart if I laid any claims that I deserve to be married. I deserve God's wrath that I know for sure. How mercifully in my deepest longing for a companion I see the weight of my sin. He knows my sorrows and my shame and like this I must come before Him everything exposed.
One day I hope to get to meet my companion. I can hype marriage up beyond looking at Christ as my greatest possession but I have an idea that God wont bring him into my life until I can trust Him that that is not all my life is cracked up to be.
To be a wife and mother is a high calling which I believe He will answer but it's a matter of how much will I trust and obey.
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